One of the most often asked questions about more recent versions of Microsoft Office is how to turn off the stupid paper clip. I wrote a bit of a mini-rant on it called Son of Bob a couple of years ago. In it I said that I'm convinced someone at Microsoft can't seem to let the disgusting animation they created for the ill-fated Bob operating system just die it's rightful death in the big bad user interface graveyard in the sky. So Bob endlessly is reincarnated and foisted upon us in stupid ways like the horrid paper clip and Windows XP's search feature.
By now many of us have figured out that the way to dump the paper clip is to right-click little old Clippy, choose Options, and remove the checkmark next to Use Office Assistant. Then click OK. Bye bye Clippy.
But some people aren't satisfied making Clippy and all his stupid animated friends go away temporarily. They want him gone forever because it's all too easy for them to rise from the dead by accidentally turning the animation back on.
So if you want to really make Clippy go away for good, you can just uninstall him. (Oh the power!)
To uninstall the Office Assistant (a.k.a. Clippy), choose Start|Settings|Control Panel and double-click the Add or Remove Programs icon. Find your version of Microsoft Office in the list of programs. Click the entry to highlight it and then click the Change button.
A window appears that lets you add or remove Office features. In Office 2003, it's a wizard. You need to click the Next button until you get to an option to Choose advanced customization of applications. Click the check box to enable it and then click Next. A window appears with a list of items. In earlier versions, you go straight to the list without the wizard. Either way, you click the plus sign next to the various features to show them. You'll find the Office Assistant under Office Tools or Office Shared Features, depending on your version. Click the drop-down next to it to change it to Not Available. Click the Update button and Office removes all animated help.
May Clippy can rest in peace.